Zonda vs. Paired vs. Relate: An Honest Comparison
Choosing to actively work on your relationship is a big step. The next is figuring out how. Today, the options go way beyond a stuffy therapist’s office. Apps have put relationship support right in our pockets, but it can feel a bit like staring at a wall of power tools in B&Q – they all look useful, but which one is right for the job you actually need to do?
Three of the biggest names you’ll come across in the UK are Paired, Relate Connect, and, well, us – Zonda. We all aim to help your relationship, but we do it in fundamentally different ways.
Paired | Zonda | Relate | |
The Big Idea | To spark daily connection through fun questions and quizzes. | To give you a practical, guided toolkit for proactively improving your relationship. | To connect you directly with a qualified therapist for professional counselling. |
Best For... | Couples in a good place who want a light, fun way to connect more often. | Couples who want to move beyond surface-level issues and build stronger habits together. | Couples facing significant challenges who need expert, human intervention. |
The Vibe | Playful, gamified, and low-pressure. Like a fun daily brain-teaser for your love life. | Structured, supportive, and empowering. Think of it as a guided workshop or a gym programme for your relationship. | Clinical, professional, and confidential. It’s proper therapy, just delivered via video. |
Key Features | Daily questions, quizzes, couples games, tips from experts. | Guided exercises, audio courses, shared journals, structured conversation prompts. | Live video/messaging sessions with a dedicated, qualified Relate therapist. |
Price Point | £ – Annual subscription (around £60-70/year). | ££ – Annual subscription (typically a bit more than Paired, less than one therapy session). | ££££ – Pay per session (usually £60-£90 for a 50-minute session). |
The Bottom Line | A fantastic relationship vitamin. | A comprehensive relationship toolkit. | A relationship A&E department. |
A Deeper Dive: Which One Should You Actually Choose?
The table gives you the specs, but the right choice depends entirely on your situation. Let's break down who each app is really for.
You should choose Paired if...
...things are generally pretty good. You still love each other, you’re not having massive rows, but you’ve fallen into the 'flatmate zone'. The conversation has become a revolving door of life admin: "Did you book the MOT?", "What do the kids need for school?", "Are we out of milk?". Paired is the perfect tool to inject a bit of fun and novelty back into your day-to-day. It’s a low-effort, high-reward way to get you talking about something other than logistics. It’s for maintenance, not for major repairs.
You should choose Relate if...
...you’re in a tough spot and you need professional help. We’re talking about serious, painful issues: recovering from an affair, navigating constant, destructive arguments, dealing with trauma, or considering separation. An app with quizzes and exercises, no matter how good, isn't the right tool for this level of work. You need a qualified, impartial human being to guide you. Relate are the experts in the UK for a reason. They provide the heavyweight support required for major structural problems.
You should choose Zonda if...
...you’re somewhere in the middle. You're past the point where daily quizzes feel like enough, but you don't necessarily need (or aren't ready for) formal weekly therapy. You have recurring arguments that you’re sick of. You feel disconnected. You know you need to improve how you communicate, handle money, or approach intimacy, but you don’t know where to start.
Zonda is designed to be that structured, supportive middle ground. We give you the evidence-based tools and guided frameworks to do the work yourselves. It requires more commitment than a daily quiz, but it empowers you to actively build better habits and tackle your problems as a team. It’s for the couple who are ready to roll up their sleeves and do some meaningful DIY on their relationship.
The Honest Truth
Ultimately, the best choice is making a choice. Deciding to actively invest in your relationship is the most important step. Whether you need the light touch of Paired, the expert guidance of Relate, or the practical toolkit of Zonda, the commitment you make to each other is what truly counts.
If our approach sounds like the right fit for you, we’d be chuffed if you gave Zonda a try. You can explore our exercises and see if it's the right toolkit for your job.